蓝天... 白云...

这天... 我陪妈妈到巴刹去... ... 遇见了他的妈妈... ... 那时伯母在摊里忙着... 她似乎在找机会想和我谈话... 我给了她一个笑容... ...

她也给了我一个慈祥的笑容... 我的心却感到小小的抱歉... 只希望... 一笑胜于千言万语... 第一次发现伯母那慈祥的笑容... ... 伯母... 我希望你能好好地照顾自己... 也祝福你永远健康快乐... 虽然没有亲口告诉你... 但我会永远祝福你... 祝福一个慈祥的妈妈... ...

我在... 旋律中的小心悬... .... 歌词里的共鸣感...

"手放开-李圣杰"... "安静结束也是另一种对待~当眼泪流下来伤已超载~分开也是另一种明白~我给你最后的疼爱是手放开..." ... ...

那首... ... 我每天都爱听过一遍的动心曲- "情歌- 梁靜茹"... ... "陪我唱歌~清唱你的情歌~捨不得~ 短短副歌~心還熱著~也該告一段落~~生命宛如~靜靜的~相擁的河~ 永遠~天長地久... ..." 非凡感动的一首歌... .... 时光不可能倒流... 接受那份无法陪伴在我们身边的曾经... 伤痛让人成长...

渐渐地... 了解到... 两个人时学成熟... 一个人时学独立...

曾经遇见这么一遍文章 - "读书人" 与 "电视人"... ...

["读书人" 永远有把不完的妹.... 读不完的书... 听不完的音乐... 吃不完的美食...

"电视人" 的角度- 其实人生不是把多少妹.... 读多少书... 听多少音乐... 赚多少钱... 而是在有限的期间里经历的... 感受的每分每秒是不时精彩... 是不是有趣? 哪怕再有限再不完整... 我们都因为曾经的精彩... 幕后的付出... 悲伤的结局... ... 而成熟和长大... ...]

这些内容是我改写的个人意见... ...

不管自己是读书人或电视人... ... 我会凭着自己的心走... 宁静又安稳的走着... .... 走向那颗清晰的心悬...
我相信... 属于自己的东西.... 永远都会是自己的... 不属于自己的... 也要觉得庆幸... 因为它让你学会如何拿得起,放得下... ... 相识是一种缘分... 放下是一种尊重... ...

感情的世界... ... 虽然复杂... 但是... 我还会是那个... 做会喜欢单纯的自己... ... ...

The book - A bowl of Nsima...

Sometimes... It was of great pleasure.... pleasure of reading... pleasure of enjoying a cup of hot chocolate milk drink while reading a book... a book that brought you to their life... the second book that I finished reading up today... "A bowl of Nsima"... ...

I thought majority of us... having been told of the life in Africa... we knew that they were really living in devastated poor... famine everywhere... death... disease... But, how much did we know the true life of them?

How much could we feel about their pain? How poor they were? How dark was their sky? How depressed they were? How hopeless in their life?

I got to know them a little bit more... ... ya.. just a little bit more... ...

It was the book... the book that gave me a sense of depth sympathy and aroused my love for them... The story was truth life in Malawi, one of the town in Africa... content written up by a few volunteers who worked n helped up there...

Never thought that their condition was ten times worst as what I had imagined before...

It was in bi-language, I read both the language write-up, and this time, I preferred the chinese version...

I still could remember how the writer described the place they stayed... the meaning of poor to them... n the meaning of poor to us... ... .... how lucky we were, actually... every night, we have a warm bed awaiting for us... we have a huggable blanket... a cosy house... fan, TV, computer... ... if they had all those things, it meant a trillion for them ady... Do you realize it?

The child was having his "Nsima"... Nsima was the main source of food in their country... "A bowl of Nsima"... was a definite survival for them... ...

How innocence was his eye... I could feel it.. ... ...

A bowl of Nsima meant a lot in their life... ... but people around us... the world... kept on complaining... this and that...

Life sometimes fulled with ups and downs... but we could make it left and right... Have you tried for it? Before making any complaint, plz... having a second thought... just dont simply complain...

I got to know... when they had no food... they searched for insects to fill up their hungry...

"Insects"... esp ants... ... had become part of their meal everyday... ...

To be able to attend school and learn to write and draw, to them, is the biggest gift in their life...

I loved this photo so much... They reminded me of embracing knowledge... Knowledge was not gained in an easy way... ... It was the gift of life... ...

They enjoyed every meal presented to them...

Do you appreciate every meal you have? truly speaking... ...

"I felt blissful enough... to have my mum's food n soup every day n night... ...^^... " ... ...


It was another article from the book...

"一寸一寸的活... 一寸一寸的离开人间..." ... ...

deep sadness... ...

since a very young age... they were forced to work... not to earn money... but just for the purpose of survival... ...

Do you know that if they rejected to work, how bad would be the consequence they faced?

Another touching article from the book - "Infinity and beyond"...

"天荒地老"... ...

At the end, the child was died... He had saved his mother and his neighboursss... ... I was running into the story... ... the writer had wrote it so movable that... ... it made your tears to drop... ... ...

finally... I believed... ... i believed that the belief that I had when i was very young... n it appeared in the book..

"虽然这个世界很复杂... 但是我还会相信... 相信单纯的人存在着... 因为我是一个单纯的自己..."

It was another write-up... ... long story too... but I liked the story... ... a truth picture of "heart and soul"... ...

"Muacksss... " .... ....

~ The end~~

Friends, when you meet the book one day, do spare sometimes for it... believed me... ...

It was not a thousand that count but a little bit of love you gained that grow you up ...

Before I forget...we have been there...

It was the day after the last paper... 11 May 2011...

n... we realized... we will be having our last two semesters soon... ...

Time flied... ... seriously... ...

A sunday night...

Third year... Semester 2... was ended... Time flied... Coming September... it would be the Professional Level... ... I'm going to become a final year senior... ... the more I think... The further it drives me away n away... ....

Third year? A year to be remembered the most... A year to feel the so called "free" at sometimes... A year fulled with assignment n report... A year with less tests... A year with ... .... ... a lot more... ...

Memories surged through... velvetly blending with smoothies... .... sweet n sour... spicy n bitter... it was like a yesterday... it was the history of your life... history of your coursemates... history of your frineds...

Happy, joyful, tears, effortsss, obstacle, stack, enjoyable, etc etc... ... mixture of coloursss... ... colouring the pages of your history book... ...

I realized... I learned a lot throughout the year... but I still felt like a little sand on the ever calming deep blue sea.... ... ....

The holidays are kinda long this time... approximately 3months+++... ... Perhaps... it will be the very last time that the long holidays present in my U life... ...

Holidaying now?? emm... I still have a lot of things to follow up for the coming NOGAP... I still have to coordinate with other bureau throughout the programme... i still need to find a better way to save budget as much as i can from the hotel... ... anyway... I was having my short holidays now... ^^.... ... ((( let throw the job for a few days... )))

Hosital n community pharmacy attachment will be starting for me after NOGAP... ... looking forward to it... as I get the chance to experience and know more how would be my career look like in the future... ...

Suddenly... I have a feel to appreciate my holidays even more... I want to use them wisely... ... enjoyably.. n happily... for my drama-series... my movie... rest n sleep to the max whenever i can... my novels... my kithchen skill... self study of OTC drug... day-dreaming or... .... a lot more... .... but... holidays are short for me... ....

Whatever it is... ... life goes on... on itself...

The sunday night on my lovely bed at hometown... was the most blissful holiday that I have... ...

无边无际...

应该是... ... 想通了...

人生其实没有几多个十年...
两个十年... 就这样的过去了....

想通了...
"虽然只是一个池塘... 但它却像那海洋一般... 无边无际..."

没有要去计较... 每一滴从心流出的眼泪...
想通了...
其实很多事情... 冥冥已经注定...

从来没有要后悔...
将心比心的对待...

自己...
渐渐地学会了...
没有撑伞的在暴风雨走着...

顺其... 就是自然...

gratitude... ...

The one who breastfed me when I was a newborn baby...
The one who admitted me to hospital when I had a life-threatening diarrhea in age of 2...
The one who never abondoned me when I was an asthmatic child...
The one who cooked me crocodile's soup and finally healed my asthmatic condition....
The one who worked forever hard in order to give you a better life and buy you comfortable clothes...

The one who... .... ....
endless story.... ....
endless LOVE... ...

She is my mum... the most prettiest women in my world... ...

Happy Mother's Day... ...
May her to be blessed with abundance of health forever... ....
I LOVE you, my dearest mum... ....

Irregular Heart beat..

Today.. perhaps... maybe will be my last time to take teh --> teh ooo ice with milk... (T_T)... actually... I liked this drink very much... ... but i seldom take it... I just have it once and once in a blue blue moon only... truly... ...



The last time that i had it was on last year, if not mistaken, once i drank it, I suffered from insomnia... for the 2 following days...

The drink keep on flashing my minds ady recently... although it is not having a special taste or what... but just gotta yearn for it... ... reasonless... ...

ANd today after my biotech paper... during lunch time... I ordered myself the teh.. (^^)... since a very long time that I didnt have a cold drink... woww... feeling a bit great to have it today...

EveNiNg time then... I had a nap... 10minutes later... ... I was awaked... Heart kept on pumping with "sound"... I laid down and slept again... OMG! I felt so UNEASY... ... uneasy... that my body was like sympathetically stimulated... I felt the irregular heart beat... ... ... it lasted for one hours+++... ....

now... feeling more better... but with a bit of uneasy... ...

I was worried... last two months ago.. mid of march... I had that "irregular heart beat" symptom.. it persisted for one hour too... but I didnt think so much...

ANd till recently... I had a new roomate... she was studying in Mahsa college, nursing course... and that day, her mum came and told me that her daughter was a girl with heart problem, now she was still taking calcium channel blocker- film coated verapamil 40mg per tablet per day... she showed me the drug...

I felt sympathetic to her... actually... ... although it was the 2nd week i stayed with her... but I got to know her condition well... and based on what she told me about the earlier symptoms... ... I... I...

I should think positively right? if I have the symptom again the third time on the following days or weeks or months then... I must be brave enough and go for a heart check... ...

"Prevention is better than cure..." ... be it a good or bad news... ...

Life is not just like one is deserving the "every good thing"... but sometimes... bad or sad thing do happen to us... ... we are the one who are trying to live with both of them...

Take good care of myself before I have the chance to take well care of other... right?

May the uneasiness go away on tomorrow... ...